My Trip to LA
2005-08-24/5:01 p.m.

This trip marked my first ever flight into Bob Hope International Airport (Burbank airport). This airport is nice. In fact, it even has valet parking.

On the plane I had an aisle seat with some frat boy next to me. I turned on the ipod and fell asleep immediately. When I woke up the JetBlue map let me know that we were somewhere over New Mexico. Score! Almost there. I will admit that there were times while sleeping that I would nod awake and realize that my mouth was hanging all the way open, or that I was falling out of my seat.

So, I watch Peter Gallagher on Ellen and then we land. This guy across the aisle says to me “have a good nap?” and I reply “well, if you noticed from all the way over there it must have been pretty good.” Then he cracks up and says something to the effect of “oh yeah” but he was laughing so hard that I couldn’t make it out completely. Yikes. Now I figure that I must have sung a song or farted the alphabet in my sleep or something.

Mike was waiting for me outside and he said he couldn’t tell if my flight had landed until he saw this big guy wearing a Mets tank top walk out. Yes, that is a good sign. Just like how the ladies in hot pink Juicy Couture sweats are how I spot the LA flights in New York.

The first night we went to see my friend Mary Lynn’s show at the UCB Theater. Well, she and I were friends a long time ago. Basically I lost her number and then haven’t been able to call her in like 3 years. I figured seeing her show would be a good way to re-establish contact. It worked! Weirdly the audience was made up of a girl turning 16, wearing a tiara, her friends, her 11 year old brother and her dad and grandpa. This really threw off the performers who were going to talk maybe about more risqué things that working at the Olive Garden. Maybe. But we were delighted with a story about John Corbett calling her retarded. So I guess the waitressing stories were pretty alright in the end.

On Thursday Mike and I actually woke up at like 8 just to go to Yoga. I love being in LA because my natural clock makes me seem like a morning person. 8am there is like 11am here. So I can appear to be waking up early when really I am sleeping until 11. Sneaky!

The class was pretty good but then at the end the teacher put on a cd and started singing along to it. I had to repress laughter so badly. Then I caught Mike trying to give me a little eye contact because I know he is dying too but he is also trying to get me to break. I then had to close my eyes in order to save myself. I don’t remember much else about this day other than watching Felicity on dvd and shopping at Whole Foods. In other words, perfect.

On Friday I vowed to get a bunch of work done. I did it but only because I had Felicity dvds to keep me happy. Remember the crack head and that girl getting shot? Man, that show went nuts sometimes. Oh! I just remembered what happened on Thursday. My computer DID NOT arrive. Hmm, yes, that distinctly happened. Don’t trust 2 day shipping from apple. FedEx told me such a method of shipping doesn’t even exist. Ooh, I have to stop before I get myself going.

Then we went to see Broken Flowers. The plus was that adventure lead us to trying a new restaurant that we had never heard of before and it was amazing. The negative was that the movie stunk. It was stink-ville stinkerydoo. However, the theater was amazing. There was like 5 feet of space between each row. You’d have to be like 10 feet tall to be cramped at this place. I wanted to rollerskate in there.

After some hipstery Bill Murray we rented a movie. My choice? Nothing but the best. ”The Wedding Date”starring Debra Messing and Dermot Mulroney. You know, he plays a hooker and she hires him to take her to her sister’s wedding. It’s all very Pretty Woman (except they totally kiss on the lips).

Saturday started with yoga. An overfilled class packed with people where I just sweated and had some smelly guy with yellow toe-nails talk to me. No thanks. Not very relaxing either. But then we went to the beach. That ruled. The neighborhood was cute. After some problems we found a place to park. The sand was really soft which I have never experienced. It was also a beautiful day without even much smog. The water was very nice and there were tons of waves. I loved it. I go swimming about once a year so to go twice this year (Venice beach and Sag Harbor) is quite an accomplishment. My only other accomplishment of this summer is getting a tan. Look out, world.

A strange thing happened. My friend Alissa lives in LA but around the holidays her phone number stopped working. Then I lost my phone that had her number in it. I tried calling her family last week to get it again but they weren’t in. Then on Friday she calls me out of the blue to give me her new number. Such an awesome coincidence. So we had brunch on Sunday at a place by her apartment. It was a little into the Atkinsy gay dudes who work out all the time (she lives in West Hollywood) so there were things on the menu like “protein salad” and “chicken breasts with steamed spinach and egg-whites.” We didn’t order either of those things. Then she took me to a flea market. Her neighbor has a booth there and she described him as having been single for so long that he has forgotten how to be with people. Wow. That description was right on. First thing I noticed about the guy was that only 1 button on his shirt was buttoned and there was a lot of food stuck in his chest hair. Oh yeah, we were in public.

Sunday evening Mikebot and I went out for sushi and The 40 Year Old Virgin. The sushi ruled. I ordered some strange things as an adventure and they were amazing. Just thinking about it now makes me want to go back… The movie was okay. There are some really hilarious parts. But so many bad parts or unnecessary parts that it got very bogged down. Steve Carrel is quite lovable in it though. Paul Rudd was especially good too.

Monday was my last day which is always sad as far as the parting with Mike goes. But this was the first time where I wasn’t somewhat homesick by the end of the trip. Perhaps LA is slowly growing on me. Maybe. There were other things that happened- like, I am sure that we went shopping at Trader Joe’sbut now I don’t know when. When Trader Joes opens here I will shop the hell out of that place.

Now I am back in the land of humidity and 12+ hour work days. The less said about that the better.


A note I found in a drawer.
The Extra Lens and Adultery.
Books are beautiful.
Ira Glass made me feel better about things.
Something that happened yesterday.