The Best Show of All Time!!!
2006-11-05/11:30 p.m.

90210 is a show that really started it all for me (read: puberty). When it first aired I was in 6th grade, at a new school, and surrounded by annoying boys with bowl cuts who thought they were god’s gift to the ladies while also being terrified by them. There was also a couple that had been together since 4th grade who’d spend each recess walking around holding hands. Ick. I needed something more. Something… awesome and manly. Something… like Dylan McKay. And, like that my prayers were answered.

I was hooked immediately. High school was already something I couldn’t wait for, and this show just made it seem, well, amazing. Totally and completely amazing. And at age 11-12, I really thought that I’d age that much between then and high school and be like these people soon. Imagine my sadness when I was in college and still not as old as these people. It was a fun fantasy while it lasted though.

I remember the first time my dad came home and I was watching it, because he hated it immediately and thought there was something wrong with me for being so invested in it. He couldn’t stop making fun of it, especially the way Dylan would whisper all of his words. It drove me crazy. Dylan was my tv boyfriend! Of course, now when I watch it I think he really needs to open his damn mouth and talk like a human being (which he started doing after season 1), but now I am older and have seen Felicity and know how annoying a whispering character can be when they aren’t sexy.

It was so dramatic and scandalous. Like when Kelly came clean about her horrible first time having sex, and when Kelly came clean on going after Dylan well after Brenda had laid her claws into him, or when Brandon caught Andrea taking a bus in from Van Nuys (just thinking about this scandalizes me) to take advantage of the better high school. And that was all the first season! Not to mention the spring dance where Brenda lost her v-card and when Donna discovered that she wasn’t totally dumb, but was suffering from a learning disability. I could go on and on, because the first season freaking ruled.

But the best part was troubled but sexy, Dylan. I covered my walls in pictures of him from Bop! And Tiger Beat. In high school I tossed out my old magazines from my closet and realized that I must have spent five hundred dollars on crappy magazines. Astonishing (I worked for every penny I had). But, I thought they were well worth it at the time. I also remember the first time my dad saw my room after I covered an entire wall with Dylan pictures. Now that I think about it, it was a mix of weirded out and being embarrassed for me. The embarrassed for me part I hadn’t picked up on at the time, but I’m sure I’ll turn it on my teenager at some point in the future and the circle will continue.

You see, Dylan looked like James Dean, and drove a vintage Porsche and he surfed. Surfed! No boys in Kansas surfed, so he was immediately much more awesome and exotic than them. And he had mystery! He lived in a hotel and had a shady father. He was bad, but good and sensitive on the inside. To top it all off he was mature (sure, this was because he was 28 or something at the time, but who cares) and I loved him. I didn’t need a love life of my own as long as I projected enough onto this fictional character. It was great.

Brandon was the other sex symbol of the show but aside from his vintage Mustang, I didn’t like much about him. He had an annoying wave in his hair and he claimed to be this good guy who was so great at everything, but he’d sleep with anything that moved, and treated people really smugly with more than a hint of condescension most of the time. I always kind of wanted him to end up with annoying Andrea since she was annoying too and then they could be stupid together.

Steve… was not attractive or smart or funny. And he got more hair as the show went on- nice plugs going on for a high school student. He also drove a Corvette and that was supposed to be amazing. Corvette’s aren’t even that great of cars or are even very expensive (especially for a sports car). Poor, misguided Steve. Plenty of guidos in Jersey drive vettes. He was supposed to be the son of a star who was super, mega rich. I, for one, was not buying it.

Kelly and Donna were a good team. Kelly was the bad girl and Donna was the very wealthy idiot. So, along with Brenda they were a perfect team. With Brenda being the best of course. Brenda and Dylan as a couple then, trumped all. Of course, then when they stopped being a couple, the show stopped being so amazing.

In college I’d watch it with Kim and sometimes we’d go over to Christy’s apartment and watch with a big group of boys who loved the show like we did. It was great. Meaning, by the time it ended, it had been on from 6th grade until I was finishing college, my entire adult life at that point.

So, tomorrow (November 7th) when the first season dvds are released, I will be so freaking happy. I’ve been looking forward to this for years. I am not even kidding a little bit. And this Friday I plan to have a ladies night/slumber party and if all goes well I’ll have the dvds and we’ll be able to watch the slumber party episode while at the party. Amazing! The most amazing thing is that my life is still not as exciting as theirs and I am still not as old as some of them, and I have been out of college for going on 7 years.
<------(psssst. marry me...)


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