I am at Lisa's apartment where the dvds are catalogued alphabetically and numerically and the pups snore 16 hours a day.

One things I've taken advantage of is her "My So Called Life" boxset. Man, Jordan was a total ass. I never liked him when I was younger either. Wash your hair and learn to read, you ass! I liked Brian, and even the dad more than Jordan. He barely ever even has anything to say and when he does talk he's a jerk or an idiot. No thank you.

We watched the episode where he decides that he and Angela should have sex last night. They have only been "dating" (read: making out) for a few weeks and he doesn't ask if she wants to, he just tells her that it's time. Then he finds an abandoned house that kids are doing it and drinking in... and he takes her there. Swooooon.

After they break up (because she won't have sex with him) he then starts actually talking to her and expects her to do his homework for him because the last thing he wants to do is learn how to read. Then, to top it all off, he bones Rayanne. God, he sucks.

Teenaged girls have the worst taste in guys.

Example 1- Clay Aiken. Teenaged girls loved Clay Aiken and thought he was totally straight. Seriously.

Example 2- Dylan McKay. He's so not funny, he talks in a stupid husky voice and he spends at least 2 hours a day doing his hair. I wanted him so badly when I was 13.

Example 3- Jordan Catalano. Reasons stated above.

Example 4- Zac Efron. I get why the girls like him. I do. He's pretty and non-threatening... like Clay Aiken. And he's funny and dresses in clothes that I like. But he's pretty and highlights his hair and tans. Oh girls, learn your lessons.

Example 5- The Backstreet Boys. Seriously, were they like 30 when the 14 year olds were peeing themselves over them? They looked like poorly aging frat guys wearing bedazzled denim and frosting their spiked tips. Sigh.

Example 6- Chris Brown. Yes, the dude who beats his girlfriends. Girls aged like 9-18 have the hots for him, even post Rhianna beating. Ladies! Stop that!

Example 7- Brandon Walsh. What an arrogant ass. On 90210 he was the most condescending and smarmy dude around, always judging everyone and giving unsolicited advice. He tucked in his t-shirts and folded his t-shirt sleeves and did his hair for two hours a day (like Dylan).

Example 8- Mike Seaver (Kirk Cameron). A total cocky jerk who was obnoxious and annoying and a terrible actor. He grew up to be a weirdo Jesus freak to top it all off. Girls, don't be taken in by a guy who makes finger guns as part of his "signature" move.

Example 10- Andrew McCarthy in any 80s movie he was in. Ugh. Did he ever play someone with a good personality? He couldn't be more wimpy and boring and terribly dressed. Next to the Judd Nelsons girls ate that shit up. He's so "nice." Just because he's not a total asshole, doesn't mean he's nice. It's a trap, ladies!

Example 11- Daniel/Ralph Maccio. Oh man, the sad puppy. You just want to protect him and ice his face every time he gets his ass beat. He goes from sweet and naive, to incredibly cocky with only the slightest bit of attention and then gets a huge ego. Also, he's shrimpy and whiny and not smart and not funny. How did he get famous?

Example 12- The Coreys. God. What to even say here? Watch their reality show and let the fact that like a million teenaged girls loved them soak in. Terrifying.

Example 13- Duckie. Seriously. Duckie. People wish that she ended up with Duckie. Her weird, gay friend who she is not attracted to in any way. That's not a good idea, girls.

Good examples of guys teenaged girls have been obsessed with: The Beatles, James Dean, Leonardo DiCaprio, Michael J. Fox, Davy Jones, Johnny Depp, John Cusack, Tom Cruise,