This year- Day eighty-two. (scattered, jersey, dreams, allergies)
2009-09-19/4:29 a.m.

So after having an awful, allergy filled night of awful because I couldn't take medicine- I was running out to head uptown to get the kids when Karen called me to say that she got off work early so nevermind.

I was so mad. Number 1- I planned around it and was missing things in order to do it. Number 2- I freaking didn't take any medicine last night and it was awful all so I could pick them up on time. Not to mention number 3, which is that I had factored in making that money and getting a check from her for the other day I did for her this week. That was nothing compared to one and two though.

Then she hilariously asked if I still wanted to hang out on the upper west side anyway and said I should come anyway. Yeah, there was no way that was happening. I had to catch up on crap and was in a terrible mood and also... oh yeah, I don't ever just hang out on the upper west side. Who does besides parents of the kids at this school? Like twice a year I happen to find myself up there for various reasons (softball game in the park... birthday party?) but never at 3pm on a Friday unless I'm playing nanny. I think it added up for me because she has been getting on my nerves a lot anyway.

I ended up meeting up with Mikki and passing off to her the super secret party mission and we walked to Staples where I finally found my damn printer ink. It was 60 bucks for both color and black and white. Is that normal?? Do I have the diva of printers?

Next to Staples is a store called DEAL$ and it reminded me of shopping when I was a kid at the dollar store with my mom. We found some good decoration stuff for cheap and then I got a mexican Crunch bar that has wafers in it and was totally good. And a Butterfinger with wafers in Spanish. I really wanted candy for some reason. They sold generic funyons called "YUMions" that I didn't buy.

By 630 I was exhausted and conked out on the couch. I hoped to take a short nap and still make it to Dr. Frank's reading downtown but I woke up at 11pm still really tired and not wanting to leave. I ate the crunch bar and laid around more. Now it's 4am and my face is pouring liquid again and I am miserable. I even vacuumed again. WHAT. THE. HELL?!?! It's so frustrating.

I am working on a new cover for the Marshmallows to bust out on Friday (ideally) or ever, really. It will be so fun! I have it mostly down at this point and will unveil to Kelly Lynn tomorrow. Danny gets back this weekend. Aww, we miss him. I bet his girlfriend can't wait for him to get back and be all showered up again. I hope he doesn't look too homeless from his time on the road. But yes, new cover, and I think it will be good AND make people laugh.

I will go to the Dr. Frank reading in Greenpoint tomorrow afternoon to make up for missing tonight. It is supposed to be beautiful this weekend.

Here are some photos from the impromptu Jersey roadtrip of last weekend on a dreary day:
this deserted shopping area was amazing.

Kelly took film photos of that one that I am excited for. It looked deserted and had dark clouds rolling in above it. Go there for all your wicker needs!

holland tunnel in the rain.

My own neighborhood:

my neighborhood.
street scene- williamsburg.
this building does not fit in.

When I was asleep this evening I had an incredibly realistic dream that I had a baby boy and he was in little baby overalls. We were in my grandparent's old house in Kansas city and my grandpa had him in his room- he was wearing adult man overalls (as he did 99.8% of the time). He was bouncing him around and the baby was laughing. Then they took a nap together. It was really nice.

I woke up and was all "grandpa never had any baby boys around, he must love this." Then I realized that I don't have a baby and my grandpa is dead. Such an odd downer. I haven't had that kind of realistic dream about him since he passed away in 2005. It was jarring.

My dream life has been a roller coaster lately, but all have been really real and confusing. First I marry Reno in an elaborately choreographed number (awesome!) and then I am jarred into the reality that my much beloved grandpa is dead again (not so awesome). Are these weird allergies making me crazy? Or, I should say, crazier?


A note I found in a drawer.
The Extra Lens and Adultery.
Books are beautiful.
Ira Glass made me feel better about things.
Something that happened yesterday.